Larry Flynt claims to run some magazine, and he can’t even spell the name of his chief Republican opponent. Idiot.

While I’m in an apologetic mood, here’s one more thing I’d like to get off my chest. On behalf of all Americans, I would like to apologize to Russia, France, Germany, and that inconsequential country in between France and Germany for dissing all of you on account of our differences over Iraq. Just a few short months ago, I thought it was unconscionably stupid for one stable democracy to lecture another over the evils of responding too harshly against terrorists who do not respect international borders. The very notion that any powerful democracy should voluntarily allow a weaker, terror-prone dictatorship to remain in power seemed anathema.

Little did I know that supporting terrorist regimes against stable, friendly democracies was our policy, as well.

On Thursday, I blogged about Gray Davis’s non-apology for his “you shouldn’t be governor if you can’t pronounce the name of the state” non-joke, in which Gov. Davis proceeded to argue that Arnold Schwarzenegger should be the one to apologize, for supporting Prop 187 in 1994 and for opposing SB 60 now. I suggested that if Arnold owes anyone an apology, so do an overwhelming majority of all California voters, who agree with Arnold on both issues. Reader Scott posted this suggestion:

I think anyone who supported Prop 187 or opposes SB 60 should call, fax or email the Governor’s office an apology.

I like that idea, but I think I’m going to blog my apology rather than fax it. I certainly would not want to encourage anyone to FAX any similar apologies to Gumby’s office, whose fax number may or may not be (916) 445-4633. Nor would I encourage anyone to spam his email system with any electronic apologies, whether his email address happens to be governor@governor.ca.gov (lucky guess if it was). No, I think a blog entry is sufficient.

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There’s not much to say about this schlock, as he is one of the “candidates” who is only on the ballot as a means of promoting his business – “Butt Monkey Beer” – on the cheap. If the idea of drinking beer named after a monkey’s bum appeals to you, go for it. If not, don’t. Either way, if you’re the least bit tempted to cast a vote for Mr. Kimball, I’d urge you to consider writing in Opus instead.

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My goal, theoretically, is to profile all 135 132 candidates in the race. Realistically, though, that’s not going to happen unless the Goofy Circuit manages to postpone the recall election until March, as it currently seems likely to do. For more information on the obscure candidates, be sure to check out KFI’s one-minute candidate statements and Likely Story’s Virtual Online Debate, in which all certified candidates were asked what their main campaign themes are, how they will fix California’s fiscal problems, and where they stand on the hot-button issues of abortion, gay rights and gun control.