Free advice to criminals: if you’re thinking of bumping somebody off, don’t blog about it.
November 30, 2005
November 28, 2005
No one (or hardly anyone) considers “stubbornness” a virtue, but for many people, it magically morphs into one when people portray it as something else, such as “keeping a promise.” Case in point: when Tom McClintock ran for governor in 2003, it soon became apparent that he had absolutely no chance of winning, and that the only thing his candidacy might accomplish was to split the Republican vote and allow N-Word Bustamante to win on a plurality. Nevertheless, rather than do what every other serious politician did whose numbers were as abysmal as McClintock’s, McClintock got in a huff and said:
“I made a promise to people when I entered this race that I would be in it to the finish line, and I keep my promises,” he said in an interview with CNN’s John King on Thursday. “When I make a promise, I stand by that promise. I’m in this race to the finish line.”
La-de-frickin’ da. He “made a promise” to unnamed people (read: himself), and somehow, that means he’s not a stubborn jerk, but a promise keeper! Neato. Fortunately, in this case it was no harm no foul, as Schwarzenegger won handily despite his “help” from McClintock – which, given the unusual nature of a recall election, may have actually helped after all. Not so for Promise Keeper #2, Michael Schiavo, who may or may not have promised Terri Schiavo that he would starve her to death if she ever became incapacitated, but clearly promised that to himself so many times he lost any sense of concern for her family. Even in the end, when he finally got his way and the bitch finally died, he couldn’t leave bad enough alone. Rather than purchase a typical headstone reading “Terri Schiavo, R.I.P.” or some such, he had to use her headstone as a soapbox for himself, adding inscription reading:
“I’m a stubborn prick, and she’s finally dead now. Hoo ha!”
Or words to that effect. But of course those words didn’t include the s-word. Stubborn bad, promise keeping, good.
Enter Promise Keeper #3, rugby fan Geoffrey Huish. Unlike McClintock and Schiavo’s private promises to themselves, this guy’s promise is verifiable as having been made to a third party, although that fact appears to remain unverified as yet. According to Huish, he told his friend Gethin Probert before a recent game that his team, Wales, didn’t have a chance of winning, adding that he, Huish, would cut his balls off if they did. Well, his team won all right – and Huish kept his promise (h/t: Dean). Someone give this promise keeping champion a prize! Oh wait, they already have a prize for this sort of thing: it’s called a Darwin Award. Dean nominated him already, and I second that nomination.
UPDATE: On a similar note, our neighbor to the north is stuck with a castrated leader, and I hate the creep. I didn’t mean that. I just said it.
November 24, 2005
If you feel drowsy after today’s main meal, don’t blame the turkey.
November 23, 2005
If you’re into photography, check out this site.
November 22, 2005
Let’s hear it for Ohio Judge Michael Cicconetti, who sentenced kitten abandoner Michelle Murray to stay outside for abandoning 40 kittens, 9 of which died or had to be euthanized as a result. Unfortunately, the message seems to be lost on an unrepentant Murray:
In a Thursday interview, Murray said a stranger left the kittens on her doorstep and the local animal shelter refused to help her. So she said she left the kittens in parks “to force the humane society to do something.”
The mother of three children and two stepchildren agreed to the night in the woods only because she could not afford to spend 90 days in jail.
“But it’s inhumane for the judge to send me out in the cold with nothing but the clothes on my back,” she said.
Bring back Robert Scheer’s mini-violin. If letting her off after one friggin’ night in the cold is “inhumane,” then what the hell do you call abandoning 40 kittens to die? Besides, the choice was hers, not the judge’s. So let’s all let out a great big “boo friggin’ hoo” for Michelle Murray. Here’s a pic of some of her more fortunate victims.
UPDATE: Doc Rampage argues that Murray didn’t do anything wrong. O-kay.
While prosecutors and law professors wring their hands over the possibility of one wrongful execution in this country (assuming you take the word of his “friend,” the real killer), local radio hosts Heckle and Jeckle wonder aloud whether this guy’s execution in another country will be accompanied by his own music. Advantage: H&J.
November 20, 2005
Alas, after all these years, Tammy Bruce still plays for the other team. I was hoping she might switch teams, but it was not to be. Then again, I shouldn’t be surprised; very few people switch teams, and half of those who do are just kidding themselves anyway.
November 19, 2005
Michelle “Maglalang”Malkin comes out and admits that the liberal race baiters were right: her husband is writing all her stuff after all. Or maybe not.