Last Weekend as a Free Man
Regular readers are aware that Mrs. Xrlq is at the final stages of her pregnancy. Baby Xrlq, whose tentative real name is Ryan Wolf Bishop, is scheduled to be born on Wednesday. In light of that, Mrs. X has suggested I go out and do something fun this weekend, to make up for the fact that anything that would pass for “fun” right now will soon be off the table. Also off the table are road trips that put me more than an hour or two away from home; else I’d attend my law school class reunion.
Any suggestions?
September 30th, 2004 at 5:58 am
It won’t be as bad as you think. Rough for the first month or so. After two months, you can pretty much resume normal activities. But, yeah, go tie one on between now and then.
September 30th, 2004 at 6:03 am
Guest blog?
September 30th, 2004 at 6:52 am
Sleep. Get lots of sleep. You will have none until your child is a teenager.
-Jay, whose 3½ year old son woke him up at 2:00 AM this morning because “my pillow fell off my bed”…
September 30th, 2004 at 7:37 am
Something very peaceful. Take a picture (seriously). Get your favorite take-out. Go see a movie. Your life is about to go on fast forward.
September 30th, 2004 at 8:34 am
Have all your friends over, because for the first three months post-baby, Mrs. Xrlq will likely not allow people to come over lest they infect the baby with their germs. If you have other little Xrlq’s, you might want to let them play a lot with their friends now, because once the baby’s born, as soon as one of them gets sick your baby will get sick too.
September 30th, 2004 at 8:34 am
Also: see a movie and have lots and lots of sex. You won’t be doing either of those things for the next few months…
September 30th, 2004 at 8:51 am
I echo see the movie, and give lots of attention to four-legged creatures. The arrival of babies often makes them feel dethroned, as it were.
September 30th, 2004 at 8:58 am
Last weekend as a free man?!
I thought that was the weekend before you got married.
September 30th, 2004 at 9:08 am
I’d echo the take in a movie and sleep comments. But let’s be practical: what about setting up for next week?
1. The baby will need to be fed on a dismayingly frequent schedule, and YOU, not your wife, will end up having the baby take a nap on your chest. She will need the nap. Get an assisted keyboard so you can type with your mouse or one-handed, holding the baby in place with the other.
2. Get a new bathrobe. You may not actually be in anything else much of the time.
3. Lay in a supply of easy to cook food: it has to be easy at 2am, or it won’t get done.
4. Stop at a bookstore and lay in a few paperbacks you’ve always thought it would be a good idea to read.
5. Get a blinking light to announce that the telephone is ringing in the master bedroom. Believe me, you don’t want the phone waking up anybody. Radio Shack used to sell one.
Oddly enough, you’ll be totally exhausted, frazzled, and you’ll find yourself happy about it. I can’t explain. Good luck.
September 30th, 2004 at 11:17 am
Xrlq -
Do something you like to do with your friends (beers, movies, shooting, whatever) and remember it — because as much fun as you’ll have, for all the explosive poops, pee fountains, unconsolable nights, bleary eyed days, you’ll never be as happy as you are with your boy in your arms.
I’m just eight weeks ahead of you on this, my friend, but nothing prior to August 10 means a lick. It was all prelude.
September 30th, 2004 at 11:24 am
One actual practical bit of advice: with Aunts, Uncles, Friends and pretty much anyone who isn’t a Grandparent, you would serve yourself well to do a little bit of expectation-lowering when it comes to visiting. Of course, you’ll want to share your boy with the world, but your wife is going to be exhausted, and getting it through to anxious friends and family that a call to YOUR cell phone (not your wife’s) before someone comes by the hospital or house is imparative.
Not so much that you can handle a string of visitors, but unless you keep the flow manageable, feelings are bound to get hurt.
Also — if you’ve got friends, or an incentive to cook, make some good food ahead of time and freeze it. Nothing was better than coming home from the hospital and finding two whole trays of green-chile enchiladas waiting for us.
September 30th, 2004 at 12:53 pm
New baby, eh? OK, see you again in 18 years.
September 30th, 2004 at 12:59 pm
Rest up and be prepared? Bah! Calblog husband would love to have to join him at the Commerce Casino.
September 30th, 2004 at 1:48 pm
Sleep and go visit friends.
Agree about lowering family’s expectations for seeing baby a lot that first week or two. You’ll appreciate some help, but you won’t want to see them all the time.
As far as the suggestion for sex, the question is with who? My wife and I tapered off pretty fast when we realized she was winding up in the ER after every other time we had sex. (Not that I’m bragging or anything.) If you do have sex, use a condom to avoid urinary tract infections.
September 30th, 2004 at 5:18 pm
Katie Day 8
That’s Shorty guarding the baby. Jim and Wendy gave us the pink boppy Katie’s sleeping in. Melissa had an appointment today at the ob-gyn’s office that has good magazines. The checkup went great. Melissa’s lost 15 pounds since her pre-birth checkup…
October 1st, 2004 at 6:10 pm
BABY BLOGGING
XRLQ is enjoying his last weekend before his new baby comes. Drop by and give him advice and good wishes….
October 1st, 2004 at 6:29 pm
Impress upon your wife that you are staying here with her and not gonna leave her side until both she and the baby both safely come home.
October 1st, 2004 at 11:22 pm
To amplify what “SayUncle” said, the first month can be rough, but it gets better. You’ll hear people, over the years, refer to whatever age Ryan is and they’ll say “Aw, that’s a great age”. In my (limited) experience, the first 6 weeks were rough, and everything thereafter has been “a great age”.
Best wishes.
October 2nd, 2004 at 5:58 am
Congrats, X.
Wacky Hermit, from what I’ve read, the practice of protecting a baby at all costs from germs leads them to have more allergies and weaker immune systems, since being exposed to germs, pollen, and the like, at least in moderation, has a tendency to strengthen a baby’s defenses.
October 3rd, 2004 at 6:13 am
“Sleep. You will have none until your kid is a teenager”. Huh? 25 years minimum.
Get several OLD bathrobes.
Photograph your wife, in silhouette with belly.
How ever much gripe water you have in the house, get more. It is both sweet and alcoholic and your imbibing it will help you as much as the baby taking it will help him.
Oh, and enjoy. This is the meaning of life and what gives meaning to life.
October 3rd, 2004 at 7:25 am
Also, if it is not too late, go out and buy a copy of Dr. Karp’s The Happiest Baby on the Block. There is a DVD, too, which is also good if you are skeptical.
Do not question me on this. Go get it immediately. Stop reading this comment and go get it. Now. Order it on Amazon with overnight delivery if you must. What the hell are you waiting for? Go, man, for the love of God, go!
Also, get a Miracle Blanket, to implement Dr. Karp’s sage advice. Get them, at all costs, get them!
October 3rd, 2004 at 7:32 am
Run, do not walk, to your local bookstore and buy a copy of Dr. Karp’s The Happiest Baby on the Block. Do this now. Do not ask questions. Stop reading this comment and go get it. What the hell are you waiting for? Go, man, for the love of God, go!
There is a DVD on Amazon for the skeptical. Trust me.
And go to http://www.miracleblanket.com. Get one. It is used to implement the Dr. Karp plan.
Do these things now. Thank me later.
October 3rd, 2004 at 7:37 am
Also (very important) — giving birth is a gift occasion. You must buy a gift for your wife. It is not reciprocal. The baby’s arrival does not count. Holding her hand in the delivery room does not count. Buy her something special.
And, in all seriousness, all of us at the Gaskell household wish you and your wife the most sincere congratulations. All our best.
(Now go get the damned Dr. Karp book!)
October 4th, 2004 at 3:13 pm
Linkage
Greyhawk is in Iraq. Godspeed, good friend. Paul’s recent laser eye surgery seems to not have affected his aim. XRLQ is relishing his last few days of uninterrupted sleep. Possibly forever. Bill at INDC Journal links to documented sightings of