For the few dinosaurs out there like me who still watch 24, I haven’t given up on the theory that this is the season where Jack finally dies, or at least Almeida-dies, and Renée Walker takes his place. I mean, c’mon. They’ve already provided the first two black Presidents and the first female one, so aside from providing the first female Jack Bauer, where else is there to go?
That said, however many sharks the show may already have jumped, having anyone but Jack Bauer be the star may be the Great White. So rather than calling the next season “24: Day 8,” maybe they can have a new spin-off series called “What?” which seems to be the favorite expression of every good guy except Renée and the former members of CTU. And since they’ve all but given up on real time, maybe each episode of What? will be prefaced with “The following stuff happens sometime after the stuff we showed last year.”
Lastly, when writing the above statement about shark-jumping, I initially made a typo and referred to it as shark-humping instead. Does the phrase “hump the shark” exist in the porno industry? If it doesn’t, it should, e.g., “Debbie Does Dallas XIII humped the shark when Debbie did Fort Worth.”