damnum absque injuria

November 11, 2009

Real Life Update

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 12:27 am

Since I’ve been blogging a lot about family law issues of late, it behooves me to disclose that as of Friday, November 6, Mrs. X and I are officially separated. If/when I discuss any family law issues that affect me differently from anyone else, I shall properly disclose such issues. Otherwise, you may safely assume that everything I say about family law issues in general, or NC family law in particular, is being discussed purely in the abstract. In particular, you can and should assume that:

  • The ability of gays to marry in certain states, or their inability to marry or even civil union in others, played no role in the end of my marriage.
  • No one is in danger of being sued for alienating my affection toward Mrs. X, or hers toward me.
  • Don’t even THINK about criminal conversations, or I’ll smack you. Seriously.
  • By contrast, if I rant and rave about NC’s physical separation requirement, the general prohibition on obtaining a divorce anywhere but one’s state of domicile, or the fact that it’s so much easier to get yourself into a marriage than out of one, you can assume that I am arguing from a position which, while sincere, is not entirely disinterested.
  • In that vein, if I rant about the truly stupid notion that marriage is a “contract,” you can safely assume that I’m arguing from the position of someone who drafts contracts for a living, who doesn’t practice family law but does know more about it than he ever wanted to, and who knows enough about both areas of law to safely conclude that the twain shall never meet.

I almost never close out comments but will do so in this case. Any regular readers who feel they know me well enough to wish to discuss this matter one-on-one are free to do so by emailing me at xrlq at xrlq dot com, or any other email address I may have given you before (e.g., my-real-first-name at my-real-last-name dot net). I’m not interested in a public discussion on this matter. The separation itself is and was public; the reasons underlying it are not.

July 28, 2009

Lost Wages

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 11:59 pm

Any o’y’all planning to be there during the first week of August?

May 1, 2009

Animals Gone, Shut the Barn Door

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 8:17 pm

Insty thinks it’s a bad idea for people to take on student loans to get law degrees while the economy is rotten. I think he’s all wet. As bad as the economy is today, does anyone have any serious projection, one way or the other, about how it will look in December, 2013? Because let’s face it; if you are a college junior, senior or grad thinking of applying to law school now, that’s the earliest you can expect to become a lawyer. And if you are anybody else, it’s further off still.

Also not taken is the Puppyblender’s statement that student loans are the worst form of debt. True, they’re not dischargeable in bankruptcy, as if that were the plan anyway. They are, however, dischargeable by any other form of debt you may wish to take on after you graduate. Mine was discharged in three years by a second mortgage during the last real estate boom. Given how pathetically low property values are today, is it too much to hope that there may be another between now and, say, 2016?

February 21, 2009

This Blog Has Gone South

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 7:37 am

Per the newbie shooter it takes three years of residency in the South, a gun safe, some ammo, some wine and a trip to Wal-Mart to make you officially Southern. Well, I got my ammo and my gun safe back in California, years before I moved north to the South, so the only thing that kept me from being a Southerner was the residency requirement. As of this instant I fulfilled it.

January 19, 2009

Quote of the Day

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 5:43 pm

Xrlq 2.0, in response to Glenn Beck’s claim that the U.S. was chasing France: “I never want us to try to be like France.”. That’s my boy.

July 1, 2008

Wee Publican

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 6:45 am

Hi, Barack Obama. This is Xrlq 2.0. And he’s my first. So far his talents include hating new food he’s never tried, and chasing after our pit bull. That, and cracking up everyone around him by pretending to choke himself and saying “Why you little…!” in his best Homer Simpson impression. And so, Barack Obama, when you say “yes, we can” can carry North Carolina for the next 100 years, were you counting on Xrlq 2.0’s vote?

Because if you were, you can’t have it.

June 13, 2008

Coming Out

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 11:30 pm

For 5 1/2 years, I’ve blogged under a pseudonym. My reason was simple: I wanted to keep my professional and blogging lives separate. Sure, I could tell you my name but refuse to divulge where I worked, but who are we kidding? I never made it a secret that I was a lawyer admitted to practice in California, so any reader who knew my name would have no trouble tracking down my employer. So as a practical matter, if my employer’s identity was to remain a secret, mine needed to, as well. And no, I wasn’t under strict orders from my boss to remain anonymous, but my boss at the time did express considerable relief upon learning that I was, anyway, for the simple reason that no one can think I spoke for a company I hadn’t even identified.

With pseudonymity comes a certain responsibility. Taking my identity off the table carried the implicit promise that my identity is not relevant to what I say. If I blog about the idiocy of secondhand smoke, you as the reader should be entitled to assume that whoever I work for, it ain’t the tobacco industry or anyone else with an obvious interest in the subject, else I would have told you. Conversely, if I do work for an insurance company owned by a mortgage lender, but do not wish to tell you that, then let’s face it, I’m not going to be able to say all that much about mortgages or insurance on this blog. What little I can say about these topics must be information that is publicly known and related to the industry as a whole, rather than to my particular company. Therein lies the problem.


October 24, 2007

Caption Needed

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 10:43 pm

August 9, 2007

Carolina in My Mind

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 10:07 pm

As of last week, I have a temp job in North Carolina which, with a little luck, may turn into a permanent position. Moving again would suck, but if I have to move anywhere, I’d rather move within the South than out of it. Speaking of the South, Chris Lawrence is officially full of crap for describing a move to Carolina as “leaving the South.” This state is soooo south of Virginia it isn’t even funny. After about six months as a born-again Virginian, I barely noticed the accent anymore. Now I can barely communicate. Over the past week, I’ve encountered the following:

  1. Earlier this week around lunch time, a co-worker asked me if I’d got lynched yet.
  2. Last week, the same co-worker asked me if I whuckum downan eacho knees.
  3. The same day, a hostess at a local restaurant (complete with a nose ring, a gazillion tattoos, and all the other garb that screamed out “I belong in Frisco, not here!”) asked me if I was donanin.
  4. Around the same time, I called Duke Power to get the power switched to my name in my apartment. I did not understand a friggin’ word Boomhauer said, not even enough syllables to transcribe here. Next month I should find out whether I just ordered power, bought a new set of Ginsu knives, joined the Fruit of the Month Club, or Lord knows what else.
  5. I recently learned that the Carolina School of Languages is within walking distance of where I work. I showed up there today asking to enroll in an evening class where I can learn to speak Carolina. Judging by the strange look I got, I was relieved to see that for once, someone else got to be the one having no clue what I was talking about.

UPDATE: If you’ve ever wondered whether “Unpartisan” actually has a human reading all the blog entries it links, or if a bot scours the net for anything that matches a few keywords, Wonder no more.

UPDATE x2: Chris clarifies in comments that his “leaving the south” post referred only to the Triangle, not to the state as a whole.

UPDATE x3: D’oh! Actually, the original post made that pretty clear to begin with. That’s what I get for attacking old posts by memory – particularly a memory distorted by my own lack of exposure to the region at the time it was formed – rather than waiting until I can get the original to load properly.

June 9, 2007

Dooced in Reverse?

Filed under:   by Xrlq @ 4:50 pm

I know they call it doocing when one gets canned because of his blog. I’m not sure what to call it when things happen in reverse, i.e., when a totally crappy work situation just about causes you to “fire” your blog. That’s basically what happened over the past few months, and the reason why blogging has been so light. In a nutshell, I left a good job in California for what appeared to be an indistinguishable one in Virginia, only to find out soon after I began that my new boss was both a dumbass and a hardass, and that his boss, the General Counsel, apparently thinks he can do no wrong. I also learned that in addition to cycling through administrative staff too many times to count, my new idiot/asshole boss had managed to burn through four regulatory counsels in less than three years. Yesterday, I became number five.

For obvious reasons, this really, really sucks. Doubly so since one of the reasons we moved here was so we could afford to live on my salary alone. Now our family income is $0. Any possible job leads would be highly appreciated. Insurance regulatory law is my background, but I’m open to other options as well. Not wild about moving yet again, but if it happens it happens.

All whining ends now. As you were.


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